Ryan and Emma's weekly journal: Baby Girl

When we found out we were having a baby we were so excited! (And I had those attractive maternity pants to look forward to!)

We still did a lot when I was pregnant-went to hawaii, went to california, did lots of hiking and photography-and Ryan found a way to take lots of not-so-flattering photos of me...

I had been working for new haven and my last day was October 17th. I was expecting that the baby would come early and all my checkups pointed to that. I was dilating at 36 weeks and by 37 weeks I was at 3 cm and already 70% effaced. At 38 weeks i was at a 4 and at 39 weeks I was still at a 4. The dr stripped my membranes last Friday and said he would be surprised if the baby didn't come in the next 24-36 hours. I was half expecting a Halloween baby or a baby on Ryan's birthday.

I started recognizing contractions on Saturday and after watching them realized they were coming in pretty close just a minute or two apart- though they weren't hurting at all. After tracking them for a while we called the hospital and they recommended that I go in to be checked. We went and spent an hour there and I stayed at a 4 the whole time and they ended up sending me home. I was a little discouraged but at the same time I didn't feel too bad physically so it was ok. The contractions continued Sunday and Monday but at that point I was not putting any expectations on when the baby would come just trying to stay productive and let things come as they may.

During the last couple of weeks I had been really enjoying my free time. I had two whole weeks to catch up on projects develop my photography skills, de-stress, fish, go for walks, take more photos, actually be social, etc. without the stress of my job I had the mental and retinal energy to do all the things that I could while very very pregnant.

The last weekend before Aliya was born I started feeling more cruddy but overall I can't complain about my pregnancy. I never threw up, I was able to work throughout it. I was able to stay active and healthy and wasn't too sick, but I did miss climbing and biking and running and having energy.

(Laying in the corn box the night we went to shoot zombies with DJ and Jenny)

By Monday(Nov 3) I wasn't feeling great but decided to get some things done (at this point I was almost making up chores). I went to New Haven and returned my keys, I picked up the lawnmower from the shop and mowed the lawn ( while having contractions) I cleaned a few things in the house and made about five more pages of my quiet book. Ryan came home from work and we went out for ice cream and a smash burger. I was starting to have more and more painful contractions. Jen came over to get copies of the photos from the biking shoot we did and brought me some food. She left pretty quickly as I was starting to be in pain. We decided to watch the contractions for an hour and when they kept hurting and being consistent we went to the hospital around 9:30. The drive there was rather painful as the cold car made me shake and hurt. At the hospital they checked me and said I was still at a 4 1/2 but that my cervix was more effaced than before. They had me stay for an hour and checked me again at 11, it was a very painful hour and every contraction made me feel so sick. Like the worst moment from your worst flu lasting for hours.
At 11 they checked me and said I wasn't progressing and that I would need to go home and would I like some painkillers ( Percocet or morphine) I couldn't believe they would send me home like that I thought I was dying. We asked for a little time to think and decide. Ryan gave me a blessing and I went to the bathroom and had what I will call a "death poop". Where it felt like my entire body was wringing itself out. It hurt so much and made me so sick. I went back to the hospital bed and had a couple more very painful contractions. Fluid started running out of me and I had Ryan grab the nurse. She checked me again and said that I was at a five and they were going to admit me. I felt very relieved and also felt very terrible.

They started me on an iv and we're going to try to get penicillin in me for the group b strep and a few liters of fluid before the epidural. I had to wait until 12:30 for the epidural but once it was in me the sick awfulness of contractions was gone and I was able to relax a little even though I was shaking uncontrollably.

The doctor came in to break my water but right as she was going to do it my water broke. I pushed for about an hour with Ryan and the nurse helping me. And then they told us to slow it down because the doctor was helping the woman next door who was having a baby right then. Pretty soon Aliya could wait no longer and the nurse was anxiously calling the doctor "so the baby is crowning. When will you be here?" The doctor arrived threw on her scrubs and within seconds Aliya was out. Ryan cut the cord and it became clear that Aliya wasn't breathing. She was blue and wasn't crying or anything. They called in the NICU staff and about 15 nurses were suddenly in the room huddled around the warming table trying to get her to breath, they called a code and asked for a resuscitation cart. I kept asking them if my baby was okay and they kept trying to distract me. After a few tense minutes she started breathing she didn't cry but she was breathing they brought her to me.

She breast-fed right away and was a sweet baby she almost never cries we spent a day and a half in the hospital because we had to but I didn't tear hardly at all and wasn't in any pain I was very blessed.

After bringing her home I fell in love with her I had no idea how much I would love this little girl the closest experience I've ever had to this was falling in love with Ryan. I feel like my heart has expanded I could just stare at her all day. Sometimes I tear up just thinking about it. The first couple nights it was hard to sleep at all partly out of excitement and partly out of watching to make sure she still breathing.

I love being a mother more than I ever thought I could.

At the Hospital

Coming Home!

we were so excited we could hardly sleep-that and we wanted to make sure you were still breathing

Time with Grandmama

Out on a Hike

I had noticed a squiggle on Aliya's bum and told the doctor about it, when he checked it he said that we'd need to check for a sacral spine defect so we went in for 2 ultrasounds, at first Aliya wasn't happy about it, but then she just fell asleep like a little angel. and everything was fine.